Choices

Every day we re faced with choices; what to eat for dinner, what shoes to wear with that outfit,whether or not to brush your teeth, whether you should eat the pizza or have a piece of fruit, which TV show to watch or to have the grande or the venti latte. Choices are everywhere and everyone faces them. Unfortunately, it seems, that we have for too long been comfortable in making choices that go against or truer nature; those that create discomfort not only for ourselves but for those around us. We choose to complain rather than exercise compassion, we choose anger over patience, resistance over assistance, worry over peace of mind.

I have caught myself  making those same choices more than once and I am learning that once I recognize that I made it, I immediately have yet another choice: continue with that choice and ultimately make myself so depressed, angry and tired that I miss out on the simplicities of the day like cat snuggles, random hugs from my children, etc., or to immediately make a new choice, one of a more suitable and sustainable interaction with the event/day. I used to think that making a choice to be happy over sad was a breeze. I mean when you stop and realize that being happy has huge benefits on your environment, your mind, body and health how could not make that choice to be happy, right? I was surprised to find that 99% of the day was spent lamenting over this or that and usually something to do with the past and specifically my Ex. I discovered that I was reliving past arguments and apparently trying to rewrite the argument which might be okay if he and I were still married and the argument was to continue. But why on earth was I reliving something that happened 6 months ago and in doing so increasing my stress level, creating a space for angst throughout the day and harboring ill will towards him? He would never hear the words/dialogue I was having inside my head, he would never share in the anger I was feeling. He would also never have the chance to "defend" himself against the thoughts and feelings I was creating inside my head. So I alone was stewing in my own juices. This is true of any inner dialogue you have whether it be about your job, your boss, your kids, your whatever. Often you're the one who is pissed off and the people you are pissed off at have no clue and so they walk around in the day without a care in the world....and if you're like me that really pisses you off even more!

Recent events within our Government have created a space for just such an inner dialogue. I myself find it insane that as a way to protest Obamacare, the government has been shut down. I find it increasingly frustrating that taxpayers are the one's who ultimately suffer the repercussions of this shutdown especially in light of the fact that the people who "did this" will never feel the impact of their decisions. While we might have long memories and vote accordingly, they still will never feel the hunger in their bellies, the fear of not being able to pay the bills on time or who have applied for a loan to buy a new house and now have to hold their breath while everything is on hold. They will never feel the terror of losing their job, even if for just a while. They made poor decisions that will affect everyone BUT themselves. I really do in fact "get" the anger and dismay and disappointment and fear associated with his "numbskull" move. Here's the thing......

While our feelings are rational and justified, they fester within us and no one else. When we outwardly complain and rally the troops as it were, we are making a choice to remain in anger, in worry, in discord, in chaos. WHY? You suffer but you're not alone in that suffering. Your anger etc., flies out into the universe like a ripple on a still pond. What you get back in return is more of what you're angry about and quite honestly, WE ALL DESERVE BETTER and especially of ourselves! If you knew, actually knew and understood how your thoughts, your choices, your words affected the spider web we are all connected to, you might do things differently....I am optimistic of this. Let me assure you that it does affect the web. I've seen this in my own life and very recently. I woke up one morning in a foul mood. I don't know exactly why but I was pretty pissy. I kept it to myself  but one by one as my kids entered into the room that I occupied, they started getting on edge and pissing each other off. Slowly the animals also started feeling the affects of my bad mood and the cats lay in wait for each other, the dog groused ......within an hour of me waking up the entire house was fighting with each other. When I changed my mood, the entire house changed. Think of a still pond in a lovely green forest, the morning sun glittering off it's surface. Maybe some fog floating above the stillness. Toss a rock into the pond and ripples echo toward the center. The splash of the rock alarmed the birds in the trees which alarmed the deer curled up on the forest floor enjoying the sun. The birds and the deer suddenly become fearful and with no real reason since it was just a rock but in that moment they flee from the perceived danger. THAT is what we do every time we make a choice to stay angry, to gossip, to worry, to relive the past, etc. Not only do we deprive ourselves of God's grace, safe in the knowledge that "this too shall pass", we deprive others of this same grace, this same knowledge......seems pretty selfish when you get down to brass tacks.

A few days ago ago I posted on FaceBook that I had taken 108 day challenge. That challenge was to find my passion, that thing that ignites my creativity and ultimately serve my fellow brothers and sisters. It was also to discover how much easier it is to choose

• Happiness over sadness
• Peace of mind over worry
• Compassion over anger
• Kindness over meanness 
• Love over hate
• Knowledge over ignorance

and to give ALL things, including matters of Government to a higher power.  Am I suggesting that we all just shut the hell up and let happen whatever happen? Yes and No. The Government needs to hear from it's people, there is no doubt about that. Those few that have harmed the good of all will in fact never know the trial I spoke of earlier and not even after they are no longer in office, but clearly they must be told they fucked up BIG TIME. But what and how we say it determines the outcome and affects all of us for the days and generations to come. Approach even this situation from a place of loving kindness because at the end of the day they are still human beings, they still deserve God's grace and a modicum of our compassion. You, as a child of God, deserve better than you've probably put out there and when you realize just how much thoughts, words and action affect all of us not only do you want to be impeccable in your words, thoughts and actions but you'll want others to be the same.

These are trying times, one in many before and many more to come. Now is not the time for anarchy but of choosing peace always. I want peace for myself, my sons, my home and for the world. I feel we are close though events might screech otherwise. I feel strongly that we are better than the events that unfold, we are better than we've come to expect of ourselves. Everything will in fact "be alright" and in the meantime I choose peace, happiness, compassion, love, loving kindness, knowledge and assistance. These are my true nature as they are yours.
~Namaste